Changing a Child's Heart

Before I write any more on this blog, I want to stop & share my opinion on parenting & discipline in the home & classroom.  There are so many great parenting resources out there.  I will be keeping a list on one of my tabs as a resource to those of you looking to become better parents. I do suggest that teachers consider parenting resources as well.  I found them to be extremely helpful in shaping me as the "day" parent!

A few years ago, I went to a parenting seminar.  I went as a teacher looking to gain wisdom in helping me & the parents of my students since I had not been blessed with my own family yet.  I WAS BLOWN AWAY!  The seminar was hosted by Dr. Turansky & Joanne Miller of the National Center for Biblical Parenting. I bought up some of their family activity books, which have come in handy especially in the classroom.

When I became a parent myself, I read their book Parenting is Heart Work!  It is a simple book based on the idea that parenting is not merely changing behavior, but molding & shaping a child's heart to be more like Christ's.  You can read some reviews & information here. I do have to say that I enjoyed their seminars more than the book! The seminar was humorous, personal & so practical!  If you can set-up or attend one at your church, I definitely suggest it for all parents & teachers!

Another great book is Shepherding A Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp! I found this book be another great resource.  I think that this book is deeper than Parenting is Heart Work.  My opinion is that Shepherding A Child's Heart is a great group study, too. You can read reviews here.

I want to emphasize the premise of these two books: that your parenting or teaching objective should be to shape & mold your child or student's heart, NOT to just have well-behaved children! I hope that you be able to use any or all of my ideas that I write on this blog to focus on your child or student's heart that will impact their will & actions!

God Bless you in your journey to become better "potters" of the "clay" that God has placed in your life!

Planned Teaching Moments

Often times the Holy Spirit uses either situations or gives you little glimpses into the heart of a child to allow you to teach a child about God, His Word or how to act out His character!  But part of the training has to be planned. 

As a teacher, if I don't plan out exactly what I want to accomplish for a week or month, it'll never got done, or half of my objectives will get left out.  I encourage you to make a monthly theme & plan out week by week what you would like to accomplish.  I am going to start a monthly theme with ideas & resources, starting in September.  I am going to go along with the Chapel theme that I will be working on.  In September we will be doing Respect & in October we will do Patience. 

Some of you may be thinking that your son/daughter is not old enough to start something like this with them.  I urge you to think otherwise.  My daughter is 14 months old.  I will be planning several things with her...from children's literature to DVD's to music!  I will try to include some simple ideas for others of you that are in the same boat.

Here are some planning tips:
1. Make a visual for your virtue & its definition for the month.
2. Find a main bible verse to memorize for that virtue.
3. Make a visual for the bible verse.
4. Read the visuals whenever the subject comes up, even if they can't read it.
5. Find 1 or 2 bible stories that go with that virtue to tell your child.
6. Find 1 or 2 object lessons (lessons based on a simple object in your house).
7. Plan a weekly theme that goes with that virtue.
8. Plan 2-5 times a week that you will do a lesson on the virtue.
9. Plan a daily time that you will go over the virtue & memory verse.
10. Plan a daily time to be in prayer asking the Lord to help your family grow in that virtue.
11. Establish an area to have your lesson & visuals.  I suggest having a bulletin board, white board or wall space to display them on.
12. Create a binder or file foler to keep any ideas & lessons in for a quick resource.  There is nothing like needing an idea & having to go searching for it!
13. Take time on a site like Bible Gateway or Blue Letter Bible to search for verses or references to the monthly virtue.  Keep a list of things you are learning about the virtue.

If you have any other ideas that will help a parent or teacher, please leave a comment!  If you are using a resource from someone else's site or from a book, please list it as well.

It's Taught, but HOW?

Ok, so I know many of you are not natural born teachers or necessarily have a teacher's degree, but if you are a parent, YOU ARE CALLED TO BE A TEACHER! You are called to train your little one!


"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

In fact, as women we are also called to be teachers to younger women! "Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live...but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children..." Titus 2:3,4

So HOW do you do it?

First of all, you don't have to have a degree in teaching! You do need several tools though:

Most importantly you need a sensitive spirit to the Holy Spirit. This requires a lot of time in prayer & in His Word! Again, IT'S CAUGHT & IT'S TAUGHT. Your character will lack if you aren't focused on shaping it through prayer or His Word! Any sins unconfessed or lack of time seeking Him will likely prevent your efforts from making any impact on your child or student!

Secondly you need to USE His Word. "And that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work." 2 Timothy 3:15-17. Not only is the Word of God profitable for teaching, correcting, rebuking & for theology, but it is alive & active (Hebrews 4:12)!

Sometimes as a parent, I feel I need to correct, rebuke or teach my child, but really it's God's Word that holds that position! We should instead take the Word of God & merely allow it to do it's job! Get the focus off of your child obeying you & get the focus on them obeying God's Word. When my child is whining, I need to stop myself from saying "Stop whining Leona!" Instead I need to bring the Word of God to oppose her actions. "Leona, Philippians 2:14 says 'do everything without complaining or arguing.' Let's change your attitude." Not only have you taught her God's Word is alive & active, but you have challenged her to obey Him! As a teacher, the idea of using God's Word to correct & teach impacted my classroom greatly! They really began to see God's Word in contrast to their actions & the actions of their peers. Weekly memory verses became more than just a weekly focus. The Word of God became a part of our classroom. It became a tool!

The third tool goes along with the second; You will have to spell it out! You must teach your child what the verse means! Let's go back to quoting Leona Philippians 2:14. "This verse tells us that in everything we do... whether it is eating or drinking (I Corinthians 10:31), playing with a toy, doing a chore, etc... we need to do it all with joy to bring glory to God (another reference to I Corinithians 10:31)." Without teaching your child or student what a verse means or how it is fleshed out, a child may not see what the Word of God is actually saying. This may mean teaching on the spot when they are in the middle of a situation like with Leona. This also means planning a teaching moment with your child or children. The more you teach intentionally, the more bad choices or situations you can often bypass! "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." James 1: 22. They need to know WHAT it says so they can DO what it says!

The last tool is prayer! You need to again bring it back to God! If you have used the other tools I have mentioned, your child has seen that God's Word is alive & active in your life & the life of your family! Now is the time to show them what else Jesus exhibited to us while He was on earth. He not only showed how alive God's Word was in His life & the life of others, but He showed how important prayer was to His spiritual life. "Pray continually...for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." I Thessalonians 5:17-18. Your child (children) need to bring their weaknesses before God's throne & ask for His strength, His mind & His wisdom.

In order to remember these tools, I remember these steps:

Quote, Teach & Pray!

It's Caught & It's Taught

As a new parent, I am overwhelmed sometimes by the idea that I have to train my little girl to fight the pressures of this world & become like Christ.  It's a big job! 

One of my friend's was encouraging me with what she was learning as she was raising her 3 young children.  She said that Godly character is CAUGHT not TAUGHT.  Suddenly the teacher in me began to challenge that statement!  Both parts are actually just as important!  I know she didn't mean that teaching was not important, she was just emphasizing I must exhibit Godly character in order to show my child how to to live it out.  However, I must also take the time to teach my child what Godly character is so they can recognize it & have practice putting it into practice in the safety of our home! 

So a new passion was born! When my daughter was about 9 months old, I realized that I needed to start to put together a manual for myself!  I know that as a teacher, your curriculum is more than just your guide, it is your objective.  I knew that if I didn't have a guide to use, I would not likely have the resources to plan those learning times!

Just a few short months later, I was asked to volunteer my efforts in improving the Chapel curriculum at my former place of employment!  So...I am not only planning & growing my own manual, but also developing & structuring curriculum for my local Christian school!  As I have been looking around the internet, I have struggled finding many resources.  My hope is that I can share some creative ideas & pull together resources that I find & pass them on to you...a fellow believer in Christ, parent or teacher!  I pray that this will enable you to BUILD GODLY CHARACTER into your child or student!

Remember...
IT'S CAUGHT & IT'S TAUGHT!